I’ve taken a step away from this blog for a couple of weeks. Mostly lots of personal reasons – I’ve been in the depths of thesis-sizing and in the midst of that, had to go across the country for a wedding.
Tomorrow we have an appointment with our RE to figure out next steps. Namely, do we try IUI again or go for IVF? In my head, the pros of IUI are that its an easier procedure with fewer side effects. Big con is that it carries with it a 15% risk of another ectopic (as does any method actually). Pros of IVF is that is controls the ectopic risk (not sure how. In reading, it seemed like IVF was a cause of ectopic but somehow it can control that risk?). Lots of cons — more side effects, more expensive, longer treatment protocol.
I think there’s a psychological factor too. It’s taken me a long time at each stage to admit I need a bigger step — for example, moving from the gynec prescribed clomid to actual IUI protocols took a while for me to admit to myself that I need it. After all, some people with PCOS clearly get pregnant. Right now, I’m just scared of IVF. It seems so involved and complicated. I worry about risks of OHSS (which I should ask my doctor). I think there’s also a sense of ‘saving’ harder treatments for when they’re needed. In some sense, I like having the cushion of “oh, if this doesn’t work, we can try IVF.” But on IVF, is there any such further out cushion? Added to that is the stress of starting a new job right around when I’d be starting whatever treatment I decide on. Do I really want to deal with egg retrieval surgery within the first month on a job? When I wouldn’t really be able to explain to my boss what’s going on? And the side effects just sound kinda scary to me. As do the injections but I’m trying not to think about that. Honestly, fear is a stupid reason to not doing something. But I guess it’s just if an easier-on-my-body protocol is available, why wouldn’t I give that a better shot?
From our last meeting, my RE definitely seemed to be pushing for IVF. Without the increased ectopic risk, I’d definitely stick to IUI — after all it worked. Admittedly not successfully but clearly I ovulated, sperm met egg, and zygote started growing.
Before this whole ectopic craziness, my husband and I had a conversation about what/when to do if the 3-4 IUI cycles didn’t pan out. My gut then was to take a break and wait till Nov or so, after I’ve been at new job a few months to try IVF. So some part of me is thinking maybe I should stick with that timeline — try IUI in Aug/Sept. If we do get unlucky again and have an ectopic, then that puts us around Nov/Dec for trying IVF. Then again, do I really want to carry the ectopic risk again? On the other hand, knowing that I have the increased risk, I know this clinic is going to be super particular about testing early so we’d have a head start.
Apologies for the rambling post — I’m going round and round in my mind about what to do. Hopefully my my RE can offer some clarity.